Monday, September 25, 2006

Why are homophobes fixated on men's arseholes?

When I'm first introduced to a married couple, let's call them John and Mary Smith, my mind does not immediately - or indeed at all - fly to what they might get up to in the privacy of their own bedroom.

Similarly, when I'm first introduced to a gay couple, let's call them Peter Johnson and David Roberts, my mind does not immediately - or indeed at all - fly to what they might get up to in the privacy of their own bedroom either.

Even if I were so pruriently curious, unless I bug both their houses or break in and catch them in flagrante - probably getting me jail time if I tried such stalkery behaviour - there's no way I could come by any information about it. Besides which, it's none of my soddin' business!

Yet when anything is mentioned about gay guys, the homophobes immediately fixate on the guys' bottoms. They are focussed to the point of— well, tunnel vision. They go into gleeful and explicit detail about what they imagine the guys do in the privacy of their own bedroom. Well, they would be explicit if the homophobes weren't so prim as to use 'fvck' for fuck and '@ss' for ass - yes, they're mostly Americans - and 'sh!t' for shit and so on.

All this is usually interspersed with Biblical references, mostly to Leviticus, about how God hates fags - sorry, f@gs - and they gloat about how they will burn in Hell for all eternity. ::cough::choke::splutter::wheeze::niiiice! Given a choice of having a gay guy for a friend or one of these homophobic whack jobs, I'll take the gay guy every time. They are so much kinder and more caring - and more courteous too. 8-)

Going back to the two couples I introduced at the beginning of this stitherum, what the homophobes don't seem to realize, or even consider, is that maybe, just maybe, John and Mary are enthusiastic practitioners of oral and anal sex, and that Peter and David find the whole idea rather distasteful and only indulge in mutual masturbation.

Bottom line - oops, a bit Freudian there - I'm straight; I don't give a flying fuck about other peoples' sex lives. So why are these allegedly straight guys so obsessed about it?

Could it be that they themselves are really
::cough::choke::splutter::wheeze::snigger::
gay and still cowering in the cupboard - er, closet?
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Comments:
I agree with you. I grew up in an area one might term Homophobe Central, and some of the worst homophobes were, in fact, closet gays. Others, I suspect, were just sexually repressed. They'd probably let the expectations of others determine who/when they dated, who/when they married, etc., and gays represent a class of people who have so totally bucked societal expectations to do what's right for them... it must be frustrating to see people who reflect your own betrayal to yourself just by being themselves.
 
Thanks, Scrubber and Imagine. 8-)

Lesbianism seems to be viewed as a couple (or more) of hot babes cavorting about/mud wrestling for their pleasure. Also, lesbians do not pose any sort of threat to guys of any persuasion. So that's all right then. ::rolls eyes::

Sometimes it seems that homophobes really believe that homosexuality is catching.

What I don't get is why homophobes are so convinced that they're irresistably attractive to gays - unless it's that they're totally unattactive to women?

I agree that closet gays are probably jealous of those living openly because they don't have the courage to come out themselves.

I am desperately sad that folks can't just live and let live. It's not that hard.
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Nods and agrees.
 
Thanks, Liz! It worked!!! 8-)
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I have to admit that for only the second time in my life I was downright ashamed of living in Denmark, when a poll showed that half of all young men and a third of all young women didn't think homosexuality was a valid life-style.

And here I thought I lived in a tolerant country.

Grr-argh!
 
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